Wedding rings for same-sex couples

Are there wedding ring traditions for same-sex couples?

The traditions are the same ones every couple inherits. Every one of them is optional. Marriage has been open to same-sex couples in England, Wales and Scotland since 2014 and in Northern Ireland since 2020. In none of them does the law require a ring at all. Rings are exchanged because couples want to, not because a registrar needs them.

That leaves you free to keep what means something to you and drop what does not. Many couples like the familiar parts, an exchange of rings during the vows and a band worn every day afterwards, precisely because they are shared with everyone else who has married.

Which hand and finger?: Where wedding rings are worn in the UK and around the world.

Do both of you have an engagement ring?

Some couples choose one engagement ring, some choose two and some skip engagement rings and go straight to wedding bands. Two engagement rings is common when both of you want to propose, or when you simply want to be equal from the start.

If one of you proposes with a ring, the other can give one back later, at the engagement party or on a date that matters to you. There is no wrong order.

Do men wear engagement rings?: What a man's engagement ring looks like and how it stacks.

Can you propose without a ring?: Proposing first and choosing the ring together.

Should your wedding rings match?

Matching rings appeal to many same-sex couples because they say plainly that the two of you are one pair. Matching can mean exactly the same ring, the same design at two widths or two different designs in the same metal.

Not matching is just as common. Two people often have different hands, jobs and tastes and a ring has to be worn every day. A slim gold band and a wide black one can look like a pair because they were chosen together.

Do wedding rings have to match?: Matching, coordinating and mixing, with examples.

Can you mix metals?: Pairing gold, titanium and black zirconium.

Gay wedding rings: bands for two men

6mm is the conventional width for a man's wedding ring, though that is a habit rather than a rule and plenty of men wear 4mm or 8mm. If your hands are different sizes, the same design at two widths keeps the pair matched while suiting both of you.

Titanium and black zirconium are popular because they are light and hard wearing. A 6mm titanium band weighs about 2.2 grams, so even someone who has never worn a ring stops noticing it within days.

Men's wedding rings: Width, metal, finish and fit for a ring worn every day.

Men's rings: The rings in our range most often chosen by men.

Lesbian wedding bands: rings for two women

If either of you wears an engagement ring, the wedding band usually needs to sit beside it, so a slimmer band of 2 to 4mm is common. Look at the two rings together, because a flat edge sits flush against another flat edge while a rounded one leaves a slight gap.

If neither of you wears an engagement ring, any width goes and a matching pair of wider bands can look striking. Our slim band is 2mm in solid gold, narrow enough to sit close to an engagement ring without crowding it.

Slim band: 2mm in solid 9ct or 18ct gold.

Women's rings: The rings in our range most often chosen by women.

Choosing and buying together

Most couples now choose their wedding rings together and the try-on helps: each of you uses your own photo and your own email address, so you get three free pictures each and can see a pair side by side.

You will need both sizes. If one of you wants to keep the ring a surprise, the size can be found secretly. If you order before you know a size, the size can be settled before anything is made. Buying two bands together takes at least five per cent off. Both rings of one of our couple sets take ten per cent off.

Couple sets: Pairs of rings designed to be worn by two people.

Who pays for the wedding rings?: Splitting the cost when one ring costs more.

Find a ring size secretly: Ways to get their size without asking.

What to engrave

An engraving inside the band is the most private part of a ring and the place many couples put the thing that matters most: the date, both initials, a phrase you say to each other or a date that meant something before the wedding did. Engraving is free on every ring that offers it.

What to engrave in a wedding ring: Ideas, length limits and what fits.

Personalised wedding ring ideas: Names, dates, phrases and fingerprints, inside and out.